If I was to get on the psychoanalysts couch I would have to begin with one of my earliest memories that I do think has changed my life considerably. I was six or seven or maybe even younger and I would kiss both my parents goodnight before going ‘up the wooden hill’. I was sometimes carried to bed if I had fallen asleep and sometimes used to pretend to be asleep just to get carried to bed – which felt like a treat. One evening I kissed my mother goodnight and then went to kiss my dad goodnight but he pushed me away – “You’re too old for that now!” he said. I remember not quite understanding: what had happened between yesterday and today?, it hadn’t been my birthday, I wondered if I had done something wrong, I felt ashamed of showing affection…. I never hugged or kissed my mother or my father after that. You may wonder why I stopped kissing my mum goodnight for she had done nothing wrong – I did not want to be bitten twice.